Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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