At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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