There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
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