I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
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