why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
