i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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