we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Randomize
