Im at strip club and am horny
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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