How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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