at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
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