He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
