I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
