I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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