I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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