His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
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