Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
