I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
