her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
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He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
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I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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