I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
