piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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