Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
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