Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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