I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
