I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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