'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
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