Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
