You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize