It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
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