OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
