if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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