all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
