You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
