3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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