Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Randomize
