So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Randomize
