I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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