I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
They are going to name an STD after you.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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