marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
