I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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