Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
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I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
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Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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