hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
