the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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