ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
