So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
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