forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
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