Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
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Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.