i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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