On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
