I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
