Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
