I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Randomize
