so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
